Draupadi looked on, when to the far end of the afternoon, darkness pulled off the long piece of cloth wrapped over
the twilight and spread over it heavily and suffocated her. She deeply grieved within and to relieve her of the intense sorrow she allowed her mind to graze at the Gowri Temple. The temple at the borders of the forest made her body and mind calm and cool. Karna, she married first in her heart seemed to be standing by her and she felt herself being immersed in the stream of love flowing from his eyes. Karna’s lips murmured. “ My beloved, I love you—much more than the most intense
love of anyone to anybodyin the world.”
Draupadi saw the intense passion aroused at the roots of the hair, and spreading all over her body. She imagined herself as getting bathed in the flowing stream of fragrant rose water, and leaning to Karna’s broad chest in absolute forgetfulness. Her wings rose as she was lifted to the jeweled chariot of her dreams. She was startled back to the reality when she heard the footsteps of her maid. In utter disappointment of Karna disappearing from beside her, she looked at the maid.
“Princess, it’s time for dinner.”
She sent her back saying she was not hungry.
‘Let those who are hungry eat. There’s no more hunger for Draupadi.’ She thought.
Minutes and hours passed by. Dharmaputra went in to Draupadi’s chamber. She set her headdress straight and stood aloof in a humble manner.
Dharmaputra came and sat on the bed.
“I’m Dharmaputra! I walk in righteousness. Mother’s word must be obeyed. So I adopted this Yajnja—this holy ‘karma’— this yaga .”
‘Yajnja?’ Draupadi was surprised. Is it a holy deed to get to sleep with a woman without her liking and consent?
Yudhishthira seemed to understand her thoughts.
“Yes. It’s a Yajnja itself. All including the one hundred Kauravas and Dusshala are older than Arjuna. Here we Pandavas are few in number. We have to stand united if we want to fight. If we are scattered the damage is only for the Pandavas. My Lady, do you know anything about the Pandavas? A family that is burning out in the fire of ceaseless pain. The Kauravas, deceitfully, pretending to love us made a house of lac to burn us alive. We have to stand in unity to take revenge upon them. I’ve only put to act my mother’s will.”
O, Clever person, indeed! Draupadi shook her head. Like mother, like son.
An owl hooted in the dark. What did he say? Did he use the name ‘a wicked or a cruel person’? Draupadi waited to hear that sound again. But, instead, she heard only Yudhishthira’s voice.
“ We actually came for good food when we heard about Drupada Princess’s Swayamvara. We were not prepared for any contest. But Drupada Princess! When I saw you, you came down as a cool shower into my barren dreams. I was prepared to participate in any contest to get this voluptuous beauty for myself.”
He must not have seen the contemptuous smile on my lips, as I was standing with my bent head. Isn’t there any limit to blabbering? Then why did he not participate in the contest? If he had, he would not have won. That was the fact.
“Are you feeling sleepy?” Draupadi shook her head.
“In that case, let’s play a game of dice.”
Draupadi stared at Dharmaputra. What sort of a man is he? In the first wedded night, when a beautiful woman is by his side, without paying any importance to her extraordinary beauty, he is going to play chess. She looked at Dharmaputra as if she were watching him for the first time. He is handsome. Very quiet and peace-loving. He has the physique of a warrior.
He has curly hair like Arjuna’s. But he has the very selfish thoughts of an ordinary man. Otherwise, he would not dare to possess Panchali by creating a lot of controversies.
“Drupada-Princess may be cursing me. But I’ve done the duty of a noble son. I had set out after informing Mother that there would be Swayamvara in the Palace and Parthan would partake in the contest. Mother knew that if Parthan participated in the contest, he would come out triumphantly. Mother said it knowing the whole matter. Our unity should not be broken because of a woman. It was Mother’s sole intention.”
For a moment, Draupadi stood stunned. I’m defeated in my life. Though she knew that she had been thrown down in to the deeper depths with no hope of a retrieval, the distress in her mind to escape made Draupadi think hard.
Did they have to make one like me with education, intellect, and knowledge as an experimental object like this? Dharmaputra continued.
“There’s a lot of difference between my character and that of my brothers. I’m a man of gentle nature. Bhima is obstinate. Each of the others has each type of character. Princess, I know, you may find it difficult to adapt to it.”
Yudishthira spread the chess board. He placed the dice ready. “Tonight we’ll celebrate playing the game of dice. Come on Princess….”
Draupadi felt anger and sorrow. She did not know what to say. She felt a burning sensation below her feet.
Yudhishthira said.
“This is my only weakness….this gambling.” His weakness is gambling? Draupadi frowned.
“After my father’s death Mother Madri observed ‘Sati’. How long could we live in the forest? When we came back to Hastinapuri, Duryodhana and his brothers behaved to us as to some ignoble people. We were inspired by Mother’s advice to get proficiency in education and ‘sastra’. Arjuna used to spend sleepless nights practicing sastras in his perseverence to win over the Kauravas and he became Dronacharya’s favourite disciple.
Dronacharya was ready to do anything for Arjuna’s happiness.” Draupadi turned her head away, as she did not want to hear about Dronacharya. Yudhishthira understood that Draupadi hated Dronacharya because he was the one who robbed
Drupada King of half of his country. He went on.
“Once on seeing the archery expertise of Eklavya, the son of the wild tribe, Arjuna cried and approached Acharya. Acharya listened to his sorrow and asked him:
“My disciple, what is your wish?”
Arjuna who did not want to be defeated in front of anybody, said.
“Master, I will fulfill every single wish of yours through my archery expertise. But Ekalavya of the low caste, has made your statue and considered you as his Master, and I don’t want him to be cleverer than me. Master, please ask as an offering to you for his thumb which pulls at the string and darts the arrow to its destination.”
Dronacharya stood still for a moment looking at Arjun. If I don’t do that ‘heroic deed’, Ekalavya who has earned the skill of archery through his piety may become Arjuna’s rival and murderer; the thought dawned on him. As soon as he asked him for this offering, Ekalavya offered his thumb as a Gurudakshina to his Guru. Then he was exiled.
Draupadi was confirmed of one matter through Yudishthira’s story. The Pandavas have destroyed not only Draupadi, but the great Archery hero Ekalavyan.
“Come on, Panchali…Play chess with me. Come.”
The man whose mind hastens with a thrilling emotion for a union , looking on the beauty of her bodily parts engages himself in game of dice! How weird it is! The news of Draupadi’s beauty and loveliness had spread all over the country. Draupadi stood looking contemptuously at Yudishthira who was sitting in front of such a paragon of beauty, giving up all thoughts other than the mad craze for the game of dice . Night moved further. People in the inner chambers had already gone to sleep. When Yudhishthira invited her for the roll of dice again and again,
she responded without any change in her expression.
“I don’t know how to play the game of dice.” Yudhishthira laughed.
“ Yudhishthira’s wife should not say that she doesn’t know the game of dice. I’ll teach you.”
Sitting in front of the chess-board, she experienced for the first time the suffocation of a person who does not know swimming and who sinks into the water for not being able to breathe. Yudhishthira made Draupadi sit beside him. He told her eloquently about the methods of playing the game of dice. It was the most detestable game for Draupadi. It is said that the game of dice is the most favourite game for the kings! The Raja Guru, the Court Rishi had once said that it would make the country lose its prosperity. When she told her father not to have the kind of a game which would instill the instinct to defeat the opponent and even kill him, Father consented and banned the game from the Court. But, look at my husband! He is squatting with the mania for gambling and not even allowing me to sleep . Yudhishthira played for Draupadi also. He shouted madly in joy at each successful step. He might be the only person in the world to do like this. Anybody would like to long for such a first night in the faint light of the bed room, to sleep or not to sleep embracing his beloved , or merging with the partner to be in close unison! He must be the only person in not doing it! Draupadi thought the First Pandava had fallen in love with gambling and not with a woman. He was not looking at the woman who was captured from the verge of a war in a wedding market, with either love or lust. Occasionally she felt heaviness in her eyes and unknowingly her eyelids closed. The dice fell down from her feather-soft-hand . Yudhishthira took the fallen dice from the floor and played for her for some more time. In the supreme joy of victory, he put the chess-board away and went to bed. He turned himself into a vine creeping over her body. The sleepy Draupadi thought as in a nightmare that her clothes were being removed by a serpent. No love. No lust. No submissiveness. By emanating the poisonous breath, the black serpent squeezed her. The virginity which was to be devoured by
Arjuna was being oozed out by the poisonous serpent. He might have felt her bodily parts to be the dice as he played a lone game and enjoyed himself. ln the joy of victory, Yudhishthira behaved to Draupadi as in a game of dice. He might have found in place of Draupadi only the chess-board and dice before him. He was playing with the dice. Without bothering to know her pains, sorrows, and regrets, the Pandava Eldest, who won her through his obstinacy,inflicted pain on Draupadi, and fell on to the bed. As in a terrifying dream, not realizing anything, Draupadi sat resting her chin on her folded legs on the bed.
(Cont’d)
